I had a deep feeling last week of writing about Mother’s day, you know, because it was close to be Mother’s day. But then, life got in the way and I couldn’t find my thoughts to go back into the writing mode, until this morning.
I haven’t called my mom since my last visit to Mexico. For reasons I have partially disclosed before, our bond is not existent. It doesn’t sadden me anymore, but I know I kind of miss a piece in my life-puzzle. And as such, I don’t recall celebrating a Mother’s Day in the last 30 years. I really don’t know what’s in it – aside of the commercialization of it, going to a restaurant, buying a gift, etc… And for the first 3 years of my newly motherhood stage I thought I wouldn’t care celebrating it either.
I was wrong.
I was wrong because while Mother’s Day is about celebrating motherhood (commercialization or not), it’s also about creating opportunities for bonding, making memories together, sharing a moment and hopefully love each other more. I didn’t have this as a young child, or as a young adult. I missed out on that, but that was my mom’s (and mine) story. That was a past journey. This year as my kid is becoming more aware and involved in my life, I realized I do want to celebrate Mother’s day, my day. My kid doesn’t deserve the same fate I had around Mother’s day. I also don’t deserve my mom’s fate either, and neither my husband. So when my husband asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day, I didn’t hesitate to say “Relaxation, Family time and some sort of Entertainment”. Since one would assume being spontaneous was in the menu, I was then required to be more “specific”, the nerve!
If we are all in pijamas at 11am, that’s okay! I won’t be upset because the day is passing by and we are still lounging. No pressure to go anywhere, no plans, no schedule.
For starters, no iPhones (or cut back by 80% instead). My main gift is family involvement, and be present. I already do so much of it with my little one that I need to integrate husband like whipping cream into a batter.
Let’s go back to basics. Going for a walk, going to the park, play one of the already-in-storage boardgames would be nice. Physical interaction is highly appreciated. I want to share our fun, our laughs. I want to make a memory out of it.
It all goes without saying I had a great day. I enjoyed it, it was exactly what I envisioned for it to be. I also learned something about myself that day “Mother’s Day might have not been celebrated with my mom, but the lack of desire to do it shouldn’t stop me from being happy and enrich what I sure hope is a lasting mother relationship with my own family.” I forsee a fun path ahead. Happy Mother’s day mom.
Did you like this post, what about sharing or commenting on it? You will get a special place in my heart.