How I miss those days with my girlfriends just enjoying a cup of java on a coffee shop patio at 4pm. How I miss those evil-eye discussions, people passing by and as such making us feel we were in a runway "Yeah, that is a nice outfit", "no that doesn't look good sister", "uh, is that her father? ewwww!".
Nine months have elapsed until I realized I had the exact same feeling, but in a playground. Oh playgrounds. A place where diversity is found, a place where a good laugh and fun is discovered. But, in this case by me and only for me that is.
I couldn't believe it, I was just looking at all those kids and my mind was working at a 100% usage. And then I prayed "Oh God, please save me, I don't want to go to hell. Please, dear mother of Fonzie keep me away of the bad road and preserve any coolness so far in me, pretty please".
Didn't work. Okay, I guess I'll rot in hell.
And then, you know you are going for it. That bad thing you wanted so badly to stay away from.
All that time at the playground I couldn't stop thinking "oh wow, many kids are ugly here". There, I said it.
I know I am bias to my kid - because, that's what I heard moms tend to do - but I call it spade to spade, baby M is so damn cute and gracious. Everywhere she goes steals someone's attention, except teens because they are evil and think they are the only ones cute and gracious on the planet.
But being fair - and to amend a little bit of my sin - I also think there are so many babies cutter than my own kid - I just haven't really met them yet. See, I'm bias again.
However, I couldn't help but wonder, are we all blind when it comes to our own?
Very recently after I gave birth, it hurts to say but it is how it is, I thought my baby was ugly. In fact, I even told hubs that I wasn't sure if I'll ever develop any kind of mom feelings. We often joked that I was going to be the rational parent when it comes to discipline and hubs the softy one. So, when I saw the baby in my hands I was looking at her with a impartial eye "big head, funky nose, what the hell with this red hair?" were the common adjectives in my head to describe her.
And therefore, I wasn't driven to take pictures of her. I know, very sad. Mother of Fonzie would not approve my entrance to coolness heaven. Very few pictures are around from the moment she was born until about her 4mo anniversary. Once that cute ball of meet gained some decent shape, once that cheeky baby developed some social skills my heart was warming up to her. She was perfect and I had to capture her. So, I have like three zillions of them. So, going back to my point, am I going blind like any other bias parent? Is this how it feels like?
Of course, I did not say to the kids or their moms that they were ugly. After all, was just a thought. And as such, I wonder if other moms have them. I know I've always been more like men when it comes to humor, in fact, very few of my school girl friends didn't like it and caste me off. They now resent their decision, I could feel it in my right rib, bu the doctor said it was my gallbladder. Oh well, they miss me I know.
So, if anyone ever thinks my baby is ugly that's fine, I totally understand. I might think yours is too ;-) and we all see each other in hell.
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